Traveling on business and for pleasure to Brussels a week ago I was looking forward to doing some shopping! Our hotel was right next to Grand Place so I did not get to shop at the world famous Avenue Louise...sigh... No time for long taxi rides…In fact in the end I am not even sure what the name of the street I was shopping at was … there were numerous brand names Zara, Sisley, Pimpkie, well
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Tests Confirm It - Ampligen Works!
I have waited 6 full months to be able to say this, and the day has finally arrived. So here it is: I know without a shadow of a doubt that Ampligen works. As I finish my 24th week of Ampligen, I can say with confidence that this amazing drug has performed "as advertised," and then some.
I know this not only because of the numerous physical and mental tests I take at the clinic that tracks my progress and improvement, but most importantly for me, I know Ampligen is working because of my own, secret test. Let me explain.
Over 6 months ago I arrived in this city after enduring a cold, cramped 16-hour overseas flight, barely able to walk from the plane to the baggage claim. My deterioration in health had gotten so bad I was barely able to get out of bed, so I came here as a last resort, leaving my home half a world away believing that this "experimental drug" called Ampligen was going to give me my life back.
Because of the flight, by the time we arrived at the hotel, I was really sick. Ears ringing, glutes and legs aching, all I could think about was getting into bed with the lights off. As we scuffled along to the elevators, we passed a baby grand piano in the lobby. With hope in her eyes, my wife asked me "do you want to play a few bars, sweetheart?" I shook my head no, and managed to mumble a weak, sad, "No. I really can't right now," and continued into the elevator. Had I had any surplus energy, I would have cried, seeing the look in my wife's eyes.
You see, until recently, no matter how sick I felt, my wife knew that I could always play the piano, and it would cheer me up. And cheer my wife up too. But over the past few months, even that joy was taken from me, as just sitting at a piano bench hurt my butt. And the act of thinking about chords hurt my head.
All of us who fight this disease have varying degrees of limitations as a result of our infirmity. By reason of the insidious nature of the viruses that activate and invade our brains and our central nervous systems, pleasures we used to enjoy are stolen. We're on the lower leg of Maslow's hierarchy of need, and survival occupies all of our energies, with the disease slowly but surely stripping away all the rest.
After a while, if you've been sick for years, you end up forgetting what "normal" life is. Gone are the days when we'd walk to the market. We no longer workout at the club, because exercise like that makes us pay big time the next day. We don't cook that favorite recipe anymore, because standing at a stove for that long is impossible. We don't play the piano anymore, because strangely, we can't remember the chords and our fingers have lost dexterity. Studies show the disease is actually eating up our brains, as evidenced by lesions.
That's what happened to me. The last time I tried to play one of my favorite Bossa Nova classics, a couple months before we came to the clinic, I couldn't get it together. I was in the wrong key, my mind was frazzled, I couldn't remember the chords. So I quit, frustrated. As I stepped away from the keyboard, I made a vow to myself. "If Ampligen works like they say it does, someday I'll be able to play this song again, without mistakes. THEN I'll know everything is going to be all right."
Because of the documentary film "The Buena Vista Social Club" I knew that music in the brain had a special "place" and that music memory, and finger memory could survive periods of inactivity.
In that awesome award-winning film by Wim Wenders, guitarist Ry Cooder tracks down an aging pianist in Havana named Ruben Gonzales, who was world-renowned before the revolution. But after Castro and communism took over, jazz clubs were closed, pianos were sold, and pianists like Ruben had to find work in other ways. In 1996 Cooder brings Gonzales to an old venue in Havana where there is still a working, almost in-tune upright piano. Because of Castro's prohibition and Gonzales' arthritis, it had been years since Ruben had played the ivories, and he looked tentative. But with Cooder's encouragment, Ruben sits down, places his weathered hands on the keys, and just starts playing like it was the 50's again. No mistakes. No hesitation. The voice over on the film goes on to say "Ruben played like that for hours, non-stop, as if nothing had changed."
It's been obvious to me over the past few weeks, that things have been improving greatly in my body. I walked 5 blocks to the market this afternoon. I am now back at the gym, doing exercise every day, and I'm able to stand at the stove and cook again.
Yesterday at the clinic they shared with me that all their tests showed I was making great improvement. From the results of my latest blood work, the physical exam, and numerous other tests, Gwen my nurse had no problem telling me that the Ampligen was working.
But I had one more secret test she didn't know about that was still pending.
Back at my apartment, turning on my vintage 1977 Fender Rhodes that I had shipped here on faith, I sat down on the hard stool, flicked on slight vibrato, closed my eyes, and felt the 9th chords by memory. Whether it was physical memory or muscle memory I can't be sure. All I know is, for the next 15 minutes, my aging fingers found enough of the right keys to musically transport me to Havana, and my soul warmed.
As I watched my own hands find chords and keys that just a few months before were evasive and confusing, I knew. My health was returning. The Ampligen was working.
Everything was going to be all right.
Beauty Radar: Sunscreens For Sensitive Skin
So what's on my beauty radar this month?I am always looking for a sun screen specially developed for sensitive skin. Or even better a moisturizer for sensitive skin with high (at least 30) sun screen built into it. The latter seems to be extremely rare… However, here are a couple products protecting sensitive skin from the damaging sun rays that I recently came acrossNeutrogena Healthy Defense
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Vicarious Traumatization and Foster Care
"I’ve been a foster parent for sixteen years" said Michelle. "And this is the first time anyone has ever asked about how this job affects me."
The last session in my six module training for foster parents was entirely focused on them. How does this very difficult work affect them? We started with the definition of vicarious traumatization (VT) from Risking Connection© (Sidran Foundation). It is:
"VT refers to the negative changes in the helper as a result of empathically engaging with and feeling, or being, responsible for traumatized clients." We can see these affects physically, emotionally, in our thoughts, in our sense of safety, in our relationships, our spirituality, and our sense of hope.
We did the Silent Witness exercise from Risking Connection© training. In this exercise, participants write anonymously on a piece of paper three ways that their job affects them in negative ways. On the back of the page they write three ways the job has affected them in positive ways. The leaders collect the pages and read them anonymously to the group. First, we read the negative ways, then we discussed them.
The foster parents spoke of not being able to sleep because of worrying what their child will do. They described the isolation of being alienated from friends and family who do not understand why they do not just punish the child more severely. A parent described how hard it can be when she has been desperately worried about a runaway foster daughter and then the girl returns and acts mean to her and seems to think her behavior was fine. A father talked about being with his son when a planned visit with the bio mother was cancelled due to her not showing up. A mother spoke about how tired she always feels, and how she no longer wants to go out with her friends or even do her favorite scrapbooking because she just wants to sleep. One parent said that for him the hardest thing is not knowing what to do, how to respond, and beginning to doubt himself. Several parents described the effects on their biological children, who resented the attention taken by the foster child and who at times had themselves been physically hurt.
As we discussed this list, several parents commented on how depressing it was. Then Arlene said: "but it is so good to know I am not alone in feeling this way." Several people said they could have written everything on the list. The parents felt that only others in this field could understand what it is like.
We then turned to the list of positive benefits. Many parents felt that they had become better people because of doing this work. They were more patient, more understanding, and more creative. They felt they had become better parents to their bio children. In fact, many also felt that their bio children had become better people because of the foster children. Repeatedly people spoke of how much it meant that your life had a purpose, that you were doing something very important, that you were making a difference in a child’s life.
The positives do not take away the negatives. They are both real. It is through the intensity of the work that personal transformation happens.
Again and again the parents said how important it was that they could talk about the affect of the work on themselves, with people who understood.
We have to make sure that it is not sixteen more years before they get another opportunity to do so.
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The last session in my six module training for foster parents was entirely focused on them. How does this very difficult work affect them? We started with the definition of vicarious traumatization (VT) from Risking Connection© (Sidran Foundation). It is:
"VT refers to the negative changes in the helper as a result of empathically engaging with and feeling, or being, responsible for traumatized clients." We can see these affects physically, emotionally, in our thoughts, in our sense of safety, in our relationships, our spirituality, and our sense of hope.
We did the Silent Witness exercise from Risking Connection© training. In this exercise, participants write anonymously on a piece of paper three ways that their job affects them in negative ways. On the back of the page they write three ways the job has affected them in positive ways. The leaders collect the pages and read them anonymously to the group. First, we read the negative ways, then we discussed them.
The foster parents spoke of not being able to sleep because of worrying what their child will do. They described the isolation of being alienated from friends and family who do not understand why they do not just punish the child more severely. A parent described how hard it can be when she has been desperately worried about a runaway foster daughter and then the girl returns and acts mean to her and seems to think her behavior was fine. A father talked about being with his son when a planned visit with the bio mother was cancelled due to her not showing up. A mother spoke about how tired she always feels, and how she no longer wants to go out with her friends or even do her favorite scrapbooking because she just wants to sleep. One parent said that for him the hardest thing is not knowing what to do, how to respond, and beginning to doubt himself. Several parents described the effects on their biological children, who resented the attention taken by the foster child and who at times had themselves been physically hurt.
As we discussed this list, several parents commented on how depressing it was. Then Arlene said: "but it is so good to know I am not alone in feeling this way." Several people said they could have written everything on the list. The parents felt that only others in this field could understand what it is like.
We then turned to the list of positive benefits. Many parents felt that they had become better people because of doing this work. They were more patient, more understanding, and more creative. They felt they had become better parents to their bio children. In fact, many also felt that their bio children had become better people because of the foster children. Repeatedly people spoke of how much it meant that your life had a purpose, that you were doing something very important, that you were making a difference in a child’s life.
The positives do not take away the negatives. They are both real. It is through the intensity of the work that personal transformation happens.
Again and again the parents said how important it was that they could talk about the affect of the work on themselves, with people who understood.
We have to make sure that it is not sixteen more years before they get another opportunity to do so.
Dove Deodorant Giveaway Winner
Sorry for the delay with announcing a winner for Dove Deodorant giveaway that ended actually last month on 20 june. Sorry sorry - been extremely busy! The lucky winner is Bryanna Pavlish! Congratulations! She must have received her prize by now! Hope Bryanna is enjoying it as much as I do :-)
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Beauty Review: Arbonne Re 9 Advanced Line
Usually I don’t do samples reviews. I have so many full size products waiting for reviews that I have no time to test and write about sample sized products. But this time I made an exclusion. I was contacted by Kellie, Arbonne Consultant. She sounded very excited about the new Arbonne line called Re 9 Advanced and wanted to know my opinion about it. in addition , I have heard soooo much about
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Born for Love: Why Empathy Is Essential--and Endangered
Book Review
Born for Love: Why Empathy Is Essential--and Endangered
Bruce D. Perry, Maia Szalavitz
William Morrow (April 6, 2010)
Bruce Perry’s new book focuses less on therapy and more on society. The book is a plea to us all to fight the many threats to the development of empathy in our children, and a passionate description of why empathy is essential to all human life.
From birth, when babies' fingers instinctively cling to those of adults, their bodies and brains seek an intimate connection, a bond made possible by empathy—the ability to love and to share the feelings of others.
In this provocative book, renowned child psychiatrist Bruce D. Perry and award-winning science journalist Maia Szalavitz interweave research and stories from Perry's practice with cutting-edge scientific studies and historical examples to explain how empathy develops, why it is essential for our development into healthy adults, and how it is threatened in the modern world.
Perry and Szalavitz show that compassion underlies the qualities that make society work—trust, altruism, collaboration, love, charity—and how difficulties related to empathy are key factors in social problems such as war, crime, racism, and mental illness. Even physical health, from infectious diseases to heart attacks, is deeply affected by our human connections to one another.
Born for Love describes the conditions that are necessary to produce compassionate adults. Although Perry and Szalavitz focus on society as a whole, it is also interesting to consider whether we are creating those conditions within our treatment programs. For example, empathy is created through the mirror neurons. Because these parts of our brain experience what we see others do, the children we treat will experience our caring responses directly. When we realize that the brain develops what it needs to be successful in the environment it faces, it is essential that we pay attention to what creates success in our environment. Does the child have to be loud and in distress to evoke empathy? If so, the brain will develop more distress.
Perry and Szalavitz emphasize the importance of safety, and how living with danger inhibits IQ development, makes it harder to fight infections, and floods the brain and so makes learning harder. This puts even more pressure on us to make sure that our treatment environments feel safe to the children who live in them.
We feel more empathy for those we think are more like us, for those who are part of "our group" and less for those we label "other". We are vulnerable to the influence of our group. What can we do to create a sense of belonging in our places? Rituals and rhythmic sharing help.
When children watch television and other media, they hear human voices but have no response to their own actions or talk. TV thus in some ways is a "frozen face" as in the famous experiments, in which a mother’s frozen face leads to escalation and then retreat in her baby.
Perry and Szalavitz report on how studying the hierarchical structure in baboons can illuminate our own response to leadership. The higher the perceived danger, the more likely animals are to blindly follow the leader. The larger the status differential between leader and follower, the more distress is seen in the follower. Sometimes depression becomes an adaptation to low status- a resignation to the impossibility of effective action. How does this relate to what happens between the youth in our programs?
Iceland, Perry and Szalavitz report, scores highest of all countries on all measures of happiness and social health. They attribute this to such factors as maternal/paternal leave and good child care but also to a feeling in that country that “We’re all in it together”. There are fewer difference and power differentials and more social cooperation. How can we develop communities like that?
In conclusion Perry and Szalavitz state that humans have a fundamental yet developmentally vulnerable capacity for empathy. In order to maximize it we need to practice love. We know that kind social contact relieves stress, and that developing empathy and relieving stress decreases both social and medical problems.
Do we practice love and offer kind social contact in our programs?
read more...
Bruce D. Perry, Maia Szalavitz
William Morrow (April 6, 2010)
Bruce Perry’s new book focuses less on therapy and more on society. The book is a plea to us all to fight the many threats to the development of empathy in our children, and a passionate description of why empathy is essential to all human life.
From birth, when babies' fingers instinctively cling to those of adults, their bodies and brains seek an intimate connection, a bond made possible by empathy—the ability to love and to share the feelings of others.
In this provocative book, renowned child psychiatrist Bruce D. Perry and award-winning science journalist Maia Szalavitz interweave research and stories from Perry's practice with cutting-edge scientific studies and historical examples to explain how empathy develops, why it is essential for our development into healthy adults, and how it is threatened in the modern world.
Perry and Szalavitz show that compassion underlies the qualities that make society work—trust, altruism, collaboration, love, charity—and how difficulties related to empathy are key factors in social problems such as war, crime, racism, and mental illness. Even physical health, from infectious diseases to heart attacks, is deeply affected by our human connections to one another.
Born for Love describes the conditions that are necessary to produce compassionate adults. Although Perry and Szalavitz focus on society as a whole, it is also interesting to consider whether we are creating those conditions within our treatment programs. For example, empathy is created through the mirror neurons. Because these parts of our brain experience what we see others do, the children we treat will experience our caring responses directly. When we realize that the brain develops what it needs to be successful in the environment it faces, it is essential that we pay attention to what creates success in our environment. Does the child have to be loud and in distress to evoke empathy? If so, the brain will develop more distress.
Perry and Szalavitz emphasize the importance of safety, and how living with danger inhibits IQ development, makes it harder to fight infections, and floods the brain and so makes learning harder. This puts even more pressure on us to make sure that our treatment environments feel safe to the children who live in them.
We feel more empathy for those we think are more like us, for those who are part of "our group" and less for those we label "other". We are vulnerable to the influence of our group. What can we do to create a sense of belonging in our places? Rituals and rhythmic sharing help.
When children watch television and other media, they hear human voices but have no response to their own actions or talk. TV thus in some ways is a "frozen face" as in the famous experiments, in which a mother’s frozen face leads to escalation and then retreat in her baby.
Perry and Szalavitz report on how studying the hierarchical structure in baboons can illuminate our own response to leadership. The higher the perceived danger, the more likely animals are to blindly follow the leader. The larger the status differential between leader and follower, the more distress is seen in the follower. Sometimes depression becomes an adaptation to low status- a resignation to the impossibility of effective action. How does this relate to what happens between the youth in our programs?
Iceland, Perry and Szalavitz report, scores highest of all countries on all measures of happiness and social health. They attribute this to such factors as maternal/paternal leave and good child care but also to a feeling in that country that “We’re all in it together”. There are fewer difference and power differentials and more social cooperation. How can we develop communities like that?
In conclusion Perry and Szalavitz state that humans have a fundamental yet developmentally vulnerable capacity for empathy. In order to maximize it we need to practice love. We know that kind social contact relieves stress, and that developing empathy and relieving stress decreases both social and medical problems.
Do we practice love and offer kind social contact in our programs?
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